Temporarily out of order


IMG_20170704_112140My right arm is in a sling and to be considered out of order. I will share here my experiences of living with a physical limitation. It will be for a while, but nobody knows for how long exactly.

While during the first couple of days I was living through the aftermath of the accident as a new experience, I am now entering a phase where the situation I am in starts looking less compelling. I know the best and most constructive way to move on is to slow myself down and focus on doing everything that is beneficial to the healing of my body.

So, I mainly focus on slowing myself down by living my moments breath by breath. I realise while doing simple things like peeling a banana or scooping a spoonful of yoghurt from a bowl, that until now I’ve been doing these movements on an automatic pilot, barely aware of what I was actually doing, just focusing on the goal, the result.

Although it might sound strange, I am glad to have this opportunity happening to me, as it kind of forces me to slow down and be more conscious of the things I do in my everyday life. I’ve said to myself that we should not take everything for granted, but never actually lived that statement. Now, on a small and personal scale, I am living this statement. When I struggle to put on my t-shirt and when finally done I find out I’ve put it on backwards, I take a breath, check how my physical is doing and start the process of taking  my t-shirt off and on again with focus and consideration for my limitations, pushing myself to be creative in finding the best way to do what I am doing.

I might have allowed myself to get frustrated and with that I might have compromised the whole situation for myself. But I could not imagine myself pushing through movements that would jeopardise the healing process, nor I could see myself waiting half dressed, as a victim of the situation, until someone came home to help me.

By taking a simple breath and allowing myself to slow down in that very moment I allowed myself to consider all aspects of the situation and define the best way to proceed without compromises. This approach that is simple and also quite challenging from a mind perspective, will contribute to me healing swiftly and will leave no room for possible regrets on actions that in a moment of frustration might have influenced my healing.

In general, being in a condition where some activities are just not possible to perform, the biggest challenge is not to be tempted to do them anyway. The temptations might seem very legitimate. I decided to bake pancakes for lunch the day after the accident. I managed but I was exhausted and did movements I should have avoided. The reason I decided to do it was driven by a feeling of guilt towards my partner who is the primary person to compensate for the tasks I am not able to perform. But the reason my partner was already very busy and tired should never be a reason for me to jeopardise my own situation. The best way to approach these situations is to discuss together the limitations and the possibilities and so agree on the priorities. This prevents unwanted consequences and frustrations that might escalate and lead to more unwanted situations.

My goal for the next days is to take it day by day, checking my healing process and do whatever I can to contribute to my healing. I am in the luxury position I can focus on myself and by doing so I make sure I will be available to do my tasks and contribute normally again soon.

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